“We can’t hate and judge a thing without helping it grow and live, but we can accept and embrace its existence to begin to understand its divinity and purposefulness as a catalyst and gatekeeper to our happiness.” -DeBorah Bellony
Today I thought I’d share the first part of the eulogy that I read for my mother’s funeral along with my side note regarding a certain event where I believe a lot of my mother’s “attitude” and ambition originated.
Daisy Elizabeth Teresa King Bellony was born on Sept. 26th, 1937 to David King and Catherine George King in the village of Seaview Farm, Antigua. She was the youngest of 13 children. In school, she excelled in many areas, but her passion was public service, primarily in the fields of health and education. She attended the prestigious Antigua Girls High School and graduated in 1954.
While studying at the Antigua Nursing College, she worked as an assistant in the medical office of her eldest brother, Dr. Peter King. Yet, she aspired to expand her educational opportunities by applying and being accepted to the University of the West Indies (UWI) School of Nursing in Jamaica.
In Antigua, Dr. King was loved by many as one of the first local pharmacist and physicians and my mother looked up to and aspired to be successful like her brother. But through my mother’s eyes, he had one dark side when it came to her educational goals.
In 1957, she experienced a deep personal lost when both her mother and father passed away. Yet, without Daisy’s knowledge or consent, her brother wrote to UWI and told them that this wouldn’t be a good time for her to attend college because of the loss of her parents. My mother happened to find the correspondences between the University and her brother and viewed his actions as an attempt to hold back her educational goals so she could continue to work in his office. She not only wrote back to the school to be admitted, she also demanded that her brother pay for her tuition as well!
I still remember my mother telling me how she called her brother after she graduated on one of those rotary phones where you spoke into the speaker and held the receiver to your ear. She told him, “I am just calling to let you know that I made it!”
Today’s inspiration comes from Chapter 3 of my e-book, Afraid Of Our Own Shadow: A Manifesto and Guide to Conscious Co-Creation. Enjoy!
Chapter 3: Conscious Co-Creation: Step 3
In this chapter, I’ll be sharing the third step to Becoming a Conscious Co-Creator and as always, I’ll have an activity for you at the end.
Step # 3
Align Your Person, Your Power, and Your Purpose With the Creator of All That Is.
Let me break that down. Align your Person (which is your Self-Image or what you identify yourself to be), your Power (which is your attention or what you focus on), and your Purpose (which is what you want to create or your intention) with the Creator of All That Is or whatever other name you call the Infinite.
Who Am I? Who I Am! The same three words, yet what a profound difference in meaning. The first sentence asks a question based on uncertainty, and the second makes a declaration based on surety. Since the days of antiquity, humankind has searched for self- knowledge. The Egyptians held this task in such high esteem that the inscription “Man, Know Thyself” can still be found on temple walls as a starch reminder.
At the age of 19, I was graced to be exposed to the Ausar Auset Society (AAS), an African American organization based on Kamitic or Egyptian spiritual principles and practices. The leader Ra Un Nefer Amen, wrote many books and meditation tapes. I happened to get my hands on one of the meditation tapes when I was at a bookstore asking G.O.D for guidance on my next step because at the time, my person felt lost. This set me on a whole new path that laid the foundation for all of my other spiritual practices that were to follow. One, of the greatest understandings that I took away from the Ausar Auset Society was the practice of referring to myself as my “person.” In other words, we were taught that in the word “individual” there is also the word “dual” which means two parts. We have the persona, which is whatever role we are playing at any given time. For instance, my persona is a Black woman, a student, a teacher, a Sagittarius, etc. Yet, all these roles are not truly who and what I am, for as we went over in the last chapter, our true nature is an aspect of the Creator, experiencing Itself through Its Creation.
When Moses asked G.O.D’s name, It replied, “I Am that I Am.” What we know about this statement is that “I AM” is the first cause of everything. That is why it’s so important to be mindful of what words we put after the statement “I AM.” So, if we have been saying for years, I’m sick and tired, it’s no wonder we show up in life sick and tired. Just stop and think for moment of all the ways in the past our persons have been abusing this powerful statement. It’s for this reason I’m so grateful to have learned from the AAS to refer to everything challenging within me as “my person” rather than “who I am..” For example, my person is tired, my person was afraid of sharing her message, etc. All of these statements are not declarations of what I know my true essence to be.
So, let’s get into how this all relates to conscious co-creation. The problem most of us have when attempting to co-create is that we focus on the end result or what we want to have, which is the fruit, instead of the cause, which is the seed. The process of co- creation is like planting a seed that with time, care and attention grows to bear fruit in our lives. First, we start with knowing our true essence, the causal or seed nature of who we truly are. This Being-ness, leads into thinking in this way, and this thinking leads into speaking in this way, and this speaking leads into acting in this way, and soon we are experiencing and having that which we planted- the fruits.
The “I AM” statement creates our self-image or persona, and we can only create in alignment to our current self-image. Now we can see why past attempts may not have worked if our self-image was one of anything less than perfection and an expression of GOD source.
Now, let me just stop here and say this. Although my person has known theoretically this concept from a young age; in the past, my person has gotten caught up in the drama of life and has forgotten to act off this knowledge based on “negative” experiences. And more importantly, the strong emotions that my person has harbored around these experiences, which in turn programmed my subconscious mind to believe these things to be true therefore creating a “Self-Image” or persona less than the perfection that I am a reflection of which is Godsoure.
The good news is that we can create a new self-image or persona by taking away from the old persona, and this is done by focusing (placing our attention-which is our true power) on a new persona based on what it is we want to experience (which is our intention or purpose). When we can align our Person, Power and Purpose with that of the Creator’s, then we can have true harmony in our lives. Okay, so with that said, here is your activity for this chapter.
Activity for Step 3
In order to become better conscious co-creators, we must create a new self-image based on the latest and greatest version of who we want to experience ourselves to be as an expression of Godsource. And what you were reminded of today is that your Being-ness, leads to Thinking, leads to Speaking, leads to Acting:, and All these things allows you to experience and have the things you wish to co-create. With that said, I’m going to share with you a template to create a new self-image. This template does four things:
1. It focuses on your seed or causal nature
2. It focuses on aligning Your Will with the Will of the Creator of All There Is
3. It focuses on the result or what you want to experience as your fruit
4. It focuses on gratitude and the present moment
Okay, so here is the activity:
I want you to get four index cards and you’ll be putting a statement on each one. If you don’t have any index cards, just write these down on a sheet of paper for now.
On index card #1 write out: I AM Being a Conscious Co-Creator with the Creator of All That Is and I give thanks for experiencing. (fill in the blank with all you want to experience) and then end it with Now! I’ll give you an example:
I AM Being a Conscious Co-Creator with the Creator of All That Is and I give thanks for experiencing Happiness, Wealth, Health, Kindness, Silent Compassion, Generosity and Courage Now!
So, the important thing is to take into consideration what it is that you would like to experience. Determine what is most important for you at this time and put those things in it. This will probably be different for each person, so make it personal to you.
On index card #2 write out: I AM Thinking Thoughts of a Conscious Co-Creator with the Creator of All That Is and I give thanks for experiencing (fill in the blank with all you want to experience) and then end it with Now! So to follow the last example:
I AM Thinking Thoughts of a Conscious Co-Creator with the Creator of All That Is and I give thanks for experiencing Happiness, Wealth, Health, Kindness, Silent Compassion, Generosity and Courage Now!
On index card #3 write out: I AM Speaking Words of a Conscious Co-Creator with the Creator of All That Is and I give thanks for experiencing (fill in the blank with all you want to experience) and then end it with Now!
On index card #4 write out: I AM Doing Actions of a Conscious Co-Creator with the Creator of All That Is and I give thanks for experiencing (fill in the blank with all you want to experience) and then end it with Now!
Now that you have all fours index cards filled out, for 4 days in a row, I want you the say each card 4 times, 4 times a day (preferably between 3-6am, 9-12pm, 3-6pm and 9-12am) Attempt to adhere to this as best you can, but your intention and focus are most important.
Now remember, manifestation happens at the rate and to the degree of our certainty and what blocks our certainty are our beliefs and emotions we have stored in our conscious and subconscious minds.
At first, don’t worry about if you believe the statements or not. Remember this is different from positive affirmations like, “people like me, I have lots of money,” etc. These are not causal in nature and focus on what you want or the fruit. What we are doing here is making a declaration, creating a new seed Self-Identity based on what you want to experience as an expression of G.O.D source. This is quite different right? Remember, your attention and intention creates your experience. Your attention, what you focus on, is your life force. The more you can imagine acting as if it already happened and feeling as if you are already experiencing what it is you want to experience and have, the better it is for you.
Just as if you plant a seed in fertile ground, allowing nothing to obstruct its harvest, when this is done deliberately, it’s inevitable that you will co-create just what it is that you want to experience founded on a totally new Self-Image.
I want to say here that this exercise might morph into something entirely new as it did for me. This is just to get you started and you should never be locked into anything out of obligation or blind ritual. Allow this process to flow and be designed with you in mind. Next, we’ll be covering Step #4
Today’s tribute brings me to the time when my mom shared with me this “gossip prevention” technique she used when she was in college. From time to time, she had friends that wanted to share their personal gossip and have her keep their secrets. But before they would even begin she would ask, “Have you told anyone what you are about to tell me?”
If they replied, “no girl, you are the only one,” she quickly responded, “then don’t tell me because if word gets out, you won’t be able to say that I’m the one who told it. If it’s so juicy that you can’t keep it to yourself, why would you want me to?”
Today’s inspiration comes from Chapter 2 in my e-book Afraid Of Our Own Shadow: A Manifesto and Guide to Conscious Co-Creation. During the 10 Month Manifest Your Desires Campaign, I’ll be sharing seven steps to better conscious co-creation, three societal wounds that can prevent conscious co-creation, and four pitfalls and how to overcome them. Enjoy!
Chapter 2: Conscious Co-Creation: Steps 1 & 2
The first two steps that I’ll be sharing are intrinsically connected, so I’ll be including them together in this chapter. And of course, I’ll have an activity for you at the end. So, here are the first two steps:
Step # 1: Know Who and What G.O.D Is
Step # 2: Know Your Intrinsic Worth as an Aspect of Divinity
From the time I could read and write, the search for self-definition was the subconscious motivation for everything I did. This compelled me on a path that included religious, astrological, metaphysical and healing arts studies in order to understand my place in the universe. At age 18, I had a revelation that changed my understanding of everything. This revelation was experienced in every aspect of my being and wasn’t based on anything I read or was told. It became crystal clear to me that we are not only connected to, but are part of the Creator, and that life is categorized by two motivations or movements. One is moving away from the Creator, and the other is moving back toward the Creator.
As a result of this revelation, I became content, but not complacent. I was content because I understood for the first time that “who I am” is essentially an individuation of Divinity here to demonstrate this Divinity through everything that I feel, do, and react to in this world. I was content because I realized that in this fail proof journey of moving away and returning to Source, we are all aspects of the Creator experiencing Itself through Its creation and there essentially isn’t any failure.
So to explain this in a more practical way or a down to earth way, I like to use the example of an electrical outlet. Without one, no appliances can work. It gives energy to everything. The beauty of life is in how everything and everyone expresses the energy they are given. So for example, one plugs into the outlet, turns it on and wow, they discover that they are a fan here to blow the air of understanding on humanity. Another plugs in and boom they discover that they are a washing machine, here to clean and wash out the misconceptions that prevent humanity’s ascension and so on.
Although I am content with this knowledge, I am also not complacent, for as G.I. Joe says, “Knowing is only half the battle.”
My challenge is to state to the world with clarity and integrity who I am expressing my self to BE, based on my actions in every moment. Because essentially, after we know who we are BEING, it’s what we DO that gives expression and celebration to our Source and says the most about us at any given time. Okay, so with that said, here is you your activity for this chapter.
Activity for Steps 1 & 2
From what you know about yourself to date, what would you like to experience and create in your life? Also, what legacy would you like to leave for the next generation? Someone once told me, “There is no success without successors.” I always remembered that because since a lot of this knowledge wasn’t passed down to the next generation (for many reasons we won’t get into here) our persons have become so disconnected to our true essence today. So please take the time to give this some thought and write it down. Next we’ll be covering Step #3
Today’s selection was originally posted over a year ago on DeBellony’s Blog. If this is your first time reading, enjoy!
“Let wisdom be your guide and common sense your pattern” – Rich Johnson
I’m the type of woman who gives a man what he needs, not what he wants. More accurately put, I give him what he needs first and then what he wants. Because of this, a man usually does the same for me. It would be lovely if we both could just give each other what we want and need, but that would largely be a matter of what is going on within us.
As a society, we haven’t been taught nor has it been promoted, on how to dedicate our lives to valuing, committing and mastering this trait of going within to create without. There has just been too much to gain from the “powers that be” to have us learn this. That is… if you want to look at it this way.
In truth, “the Devil” gives us what we want and G.O.D. gives us what we need. And they are both one and the same. Two sides of the same coin.
A Word to My Sisters
Sometimes a man is over run by his wants and desires, whether they are “good or bad.” In this case, he will lie to G.O.D and to you to receive it. Letting this type of man into your heart is like bringing a virus into your dome. His true intention is not to hurt you, but the very nature of his lack of sincerity affects you directly.
Sometimes a man has a strong love for what he needs, but doesn’t have the courage or direction to really discover what these needs may be. It was never taught to him. It was never demonstrated by the men is his life. Yet, since he is like a ship without a sail, he brings this same lack of direction to your lap. Even if he brings you the moon, sun and stars, BEWARE. He can do all of this for the outside reflection, for it doesn’t require going within, the very place he is most afraid of.
Sometimes a man has a lack of commitment that interferes with what he knows he needs. One day he knows where he is going with his map in hand, ready for the journey. The next day the cares and carnal desires of a lower density keep him from taking the consistent and committed steps needed to bring him to his destination. This type of man is to be avoided or put on call from the get go. If this is not done, he brings this lack of commitment to your domicile and thus weakens your immunity.
You see, a man’s wants unchecked by his needs is like a cancer to a virtuous woman. Yet, it is the very thing she also needs versus what she wants. Her want is to share love freely and openly from her heart without care. Yet, her need is to share love with wisdom and unconditional love. This wisdom only comes from the inner, under and over-standing that the man she attracts to her is her mirror. This allows her to act accordingly from within, transforming what she manifests without.
I envision a new paradigm for intimate relationships where the focus is on how well we can support our mates in loving themselves (regardless of our personal wants), and on how well our mates support us in loving ourselves and being ourselves, above all else. This tiny shift in focus can make a world of a difference.
When a woman has a strong love for Self, she can keep her boundaries in place, not out of defensiveness or a need to manipulate and control, but out of a true love and respect for the Divine Laws of Nature and beyond that has the good of each person in mind and heart. This is the impersonal, unconditional love that we ALL came here to master.
It’s amazing how G.O.D uses one force to balance another. So when a man and woman are in balance with their needs and wants, they are ready to manifest that mate. The one that mirrors their true intent. There is no one outside to blame or put all their stock in and worry about losing. There is only Being THAT within and seeing it manifest in the world with grace, ease and glory!
I’m kicking off the first Tuesday Tribute with Patti Labelle’s song Anything, featuring Kanye West and Consequence for a special reason. First and foremost, I love Patti Labelle and the message of this song. But the special reason has a little history to it.
For some time, my brother Richard has had the beginning of this song as his ring tone, yet I had never heard the song until recently when he gave me his ipod with all of his music. When I heard it, I immediately associated it with his ring tone and somehow thought Patti was saying “you’re a child of a king” instead of “you’re a child of the King.”
I guess that’s what I wanted to hear, because my mother’s maiden name is Daisy King and I am, literally, a child of a King. So since then, it’s like this song is my special message and encouragement from my mother that I can do ANYTHING as the child of A King and The King as well. Enjoy!
Today’s inspiration comes from Day 3 of Manifest Your Desires: 365 Ways to Make Your Dreams A Reality by Esther and Jerry Hicks, and it’s totally in alignment with the main motto of Who I Am Enterprises. Next week, I’ll be sharing a post from my e-book. Enjoy!
“Words really do not teach. Your true knowledge comes from your own life experiences. And while you will be a constant gatherer of experience and knowledge, your life is not only about that- it’s about fulfillment, satisfaction, and joy. Your life is about the continuing expression of who you truly are.”